Penis Size Myths And Facts!
Penis size myths and facts
Myth 1: "My penis is smaller than average."
Many men think their penis is below average size. But what are they comparing it with? Where do heterosexual men get their view of how large or small an average penis might be?
From the locker room, perhaps, or more likely from watching porn films - a rather sad way of reinforcing a low opinion of one's penis, since most porn stars are well-endowed with penises much larger than average.
And having a large penis is not a blessing ether, as you may well know if you happen to have talked to a woman who has had a lover with a large cock! (It can hit the cervix, and cause pain during intercourse. It can be uncomfortable to even get it in widthways, and it can be too long to thrust comfortably.)
But guess what? If you look at your penis from the viewpoint of your lover - in other words, from the side, not from above, it magically appears longer!
This is something to do with the effect of perspective - so look at it sideways in a mirror, no matter how small you may think it is normally, and you might find it suddenly appears longer. And penis size is truly an area where appearance is everything!
Lastly, what is average size? Do you even know what the size of an average penis for your racial group actually is? (Answer: 5.9 inches erect for whites, 6.4 for black men, and 5.4 inches for Asian men.)
But, here's the thing: when you have an average, about half of all measurements must be smaller than average. So what does average penis size really signify? A standard by which you can always feel inferior to other men if your erect dick happens to be 5.9 inches long?
Finally, remember that the satisfaction of a woman is largely based in her mind, not in her body.
She's not likely to judge you for the shape and size of your body parts, but it is possible she may well judge you for your attitude towards them. And if you make a big thing about having a small penis, then she might just regard you as less of a man because of your whinging, not because of your cock size. The same is true of body size.
She is much more likely to see herself as undesirable because of her weight than because of the size of her breasts or the appearance of her vulva. So the more you can do to lose weight, feel fit, look good and exercise well will keep her admiring you. And of course, if you know how to lose weight then you can pass the secrets on to her.....
She may like the feeling of a large penis in her vagina when she makes love to you, but whether or not she wants to make love to you again depends much more on how she feels about you as a man, as a lover, and even as a potential partner, than it does on the size of your penis.
She wants to feel cherished, loved, and appreciated - just as you want to feel respected and honored - and that isn't achieved by ramming a large cock into her body. It really is what you do with it, not how big it is, that counts. It follows that knowing about a lot of different sex positions might impress her - and if you want to do that, you can check them all out here but that won't make you into the kind of man she wants to spend her life with.
In fact, what you probably should be paying more attention to is the size of your body - or at least, the shape of you body. Check this out to find out why. There's a lot of evidence women like a man who is lean and muscular. And, if you're fat, then rapid weight loss might be the fastest route to better sex. You don't have to look like an Adonis. Just take care of your body.
Myth 2 "Women adore large penises."
Now, who told you that? There are some size queens, that is true, but most women like an average penis to have sex with (it's that comfort thing again - being vaginally stretched to bursting point by a huge member is the stuff of female fantasy.
And like many fantasies, when it comes to bedtime, the reality is rather different.) Anyway, who would want to be poked in the cervix during sex? It's like having a pap smear with your lover's penis as the medical implement in the middle of your most romantic and intimate moments.
The cynical among you may be saying: "Yeah, right!" Well, all I can say is this: go and search for "what women think about penis size" in Google or Yahoo.
When you've finished laughing at the claims of the penile enlargement sites, read what the women have to say in their various forums on this subject and you'll soon see that I'm right.
Myth 3 "But surely, women like to look at large penises?"
Ah yes, my friend. And don't you like to look at large breasts? Does that mean you won't have a relationship with a woman who hasn't got a huge pair of breasts adorning her front? No, I thought not.
Now pout yourself in the woman's shoes. Of course she's interested in the male genitals and what they look like - thankfully for you, she might even be turned on by the sight of a penis, and she might even find the bigger they are the more arousing they seem.
Count yourself lucky she'll be turning her attention to your penis, with equal enthusiasm, when she's finished fantasizing about large cocks!
Besides, if women have any preference at all where penile dimensions are concerned, they like thickness over length because it gives them a sense of fullness, which, I am reliably informed, can be pleasing for a woman during intercourse. (Hmm....all women feel loose to their lover if they are very aroused and wet.
Needless to say, should you have a thin penile shaft, this is potentially a point of significance. The key to obtaining sexual pleasure in this situation - no, in any situation - can be found in a compromise, which is beautifully described on this website - how to enjoy orgasms during sex.)
You can find the original reference about women's preference for thickness over length in penis size here if you're really obsessed with this subject.
You'll also be delighted to know that those of us who care about the satisfaction of men with small penises have devoted acres of the internet to establishing which sexual positions can give you (and your lover) the greatest pleasure during intercourse.
So, if you look at sex techniques and positions websites, you'll find pages devoted to the challenge of getting good lovin' feelings when you think you're deprived in the penis size stakes.
(And for that matter, it also deals with the rather less pleasant matter of being hugely endowed, which gives every one problems, man and woman alike. I mean, where do you put it when you get erect on the beach?)
If you happen to be over eight inches long, and you'd like to offer your comments, they would be most welcome. Email us at the address at the bottom of the page.
Myth 4 "My penis is too small! I'm not a real man! Oh my God!"
I don't want to be flippant about this, but where did you pick up the idea that the larger your dick, the more of a man you are? I was in a group recently dealing with sexual issues, where we all got naked - just for fun, you know - when a man with a penis that seemed fine to me, stood up and said something like:
"I never thought I could do this, because my cock is smaller than everyone else's." I sneaked a look, and what in fact he had between his legs was a perfectly normal penis, one of those where the shaft of the penis retracts into the man's body when the penis is soft or flaccid, only to dramatically reappear when the penis becomes erect.
About five percent of men have a penis like this, and they are nearly all normal size - six inches or so - when erect. Some of their owners suffer agonies because of the small flaccid size. Here's how we torture ourselves over this issues of penis size, so unnecessarily.
I wonder when boys become so identified with their dicks? And how does that happen, exactly? And whey do men equate the size of their penis with their masculinity.......especially when most women would see a real man as one who espoused virtues like courage, strength, compassion, love, humility, purpose and loyalty.
I did wonder how this guy would have felt if he had been one of the very considerable number of men who have an erect penis under four inches long. If you have an erect penis smaller than average why not take this chance to be famous?
Write in and tell us about your penis and your life. Email us at the address at the bottom of the page.
Myth 5 "Penis size affects sexual pleasure for men and women."
No, no, no! It does not. Most women do not reach orgasm during intercourse, which depends much more on how long a man can thrust than on how big his penis might be.
The area of the vagina which promotes a vaginal orgasm is on the front wall of the vagina about two inches inside, so you don't have to have an especially big penis to stimulate that! It's long lasting, rhythmic thrusting which will bring many women off, but most men cannot last long enough to do this.
Most men simply come too quickly, but being a rapid ejaculator has nothing to with your penis size. Be you large or small, you can learn to stop premature ejaculation and become a long lasting lover who can take your woman to orgasm during intercourse.
If you want to take another approach to the achievement of sexual pleasure, one which accepts you aren't going to last more than a few minutes during sex before you ejaculate, then you might wish to seek alternative ways of controlling sexual problems.
One woman kindly wrote in to say that her man has an erect penis about 5 inches long, and to tell us that this was in no way preventing her getting sexual pleasure.
She also told us his penis was not thick but that he could drive her crazy with it by rubbing it along the sensitive parts of her vulva and labia and tickling her clit with his glans.
Ah yes! Very satisfying for all concerned - and as she finished her email with the words "WOW! Talk about multiple orgasms!" I guess those men who have smaller than average penises - a mere 49.9% of all men - needn't feel too bad, and obviously should focus on making sex better with what they've got!
And the truth is that sexual success for men is much more about sexual technique than anything else.
If you know how to make love, and you know how to please a woman so that she thinks she is the most special person in your life, and give her the attention she needs and desires, then you are well on your way to knowing how to make her fall in love with you, or, more accurately, knowing how to fall in love yourself - the quality which all men need as part of their mature masculinity..
Myth 6 "Penis shape doesn't matter; penis size does"
Well, perhaps yes, perhaps no. Here's an extract from a place which ought to be full of those who know: a women's forum. "Did you ever think that a penis like a lollipop - one with a big glans on the end of a thin shaft - is perfect for sucking, while a small acorn-like helmet on a thicker shaft could be just what you need for anal sex?" No, I must admit, I never did.
Myth 7 "The average penis size is over 6 inches long."
No, it isn't. Why not try measuring your own penis? Then you can compare it with the data you get on convincing websites, like this one......now, do you know how to measure your dick? Rather than measuring your dick against other men's and finding it wanting in your imagination, try doing it for real.
The overall length of your erection along the top surface, from base to tip, can be measured with a ruler or, if your penis is a bit curvy, a piece of string laid along the top surface.
Take a few measurements: you might be surprised to find that your penis isn't always the same length, sometimes being a bit longer (and harder) than at other times.
If you have a big bulge of fat over the base of your penis, well, tough luck. That always makes it look a lot shorter than it actually is (so maybe getting a bigger penis can be simple after all: just lose some weight!).
To measure your girth, simply wrap the string all the way around the fattest part of your penis and see how big it is with the help of a ruler.
Now - what's normal? The right answer to that question is that whatever you have is normal, but on the assumption that if you believed that statement you wouldn't be reading this website, let's look at some data.
The-penis.com did a survey in 2003 which proved that the average length of a white erect penis is 5.9 inches. The average girth is 4.9 inches. There you go! How do you compare? Feel any better?
Probably not, because the sad fact is that how you feel about your penis has more to do with how you feel about yourself than anything else.
It's a self-esteem issue, for sure; while having a bigger penis may make you feel better, the real key to feeling good as a man is to develop a sense of pride and masculine values for you and your achievements.
(So, why do we have the adverts above - for bigger penises? Well, because there's a lot more information on that website than size "improvements" alone, and besides, we want to make money.
Plus, while we say you'd be better off developing a sense of self-esteem based on your own attributes, not those of your dick, most men would still prefer to have a penis that was perhaps, you know, a bit bigger than average, a bit bigger than what they have now, a bit bigger than their lover's expectations.
It's a hard nut to crack, since each of us will come to a view of how important penis size is to us through our own experience, not through being told by well-meaning websites like, well, this one.
By the way, how would you feel if you were the man in every fifty men whose penis is four inches or less in length when erect?
Myth 8 "Race affects penis size."
Actually this is partly true. American black men have a small size advantage - if a bigger penis is an advantage - since their penises are slightly bigger and longer (but not by much - only half an inch or so). Asian men have smaller penises.
Myth 9 "A slack vagina needs a big penis to feel anything"
Ah well, all vaginas feel slack to a man sometimes, especially when the owner is very aroused and lubrication is pouring out of her vagina.
And even so I must admit that some women are still slacker than others, especially some who have given birth (though it does not have to be that way - my partner has given birth and is very tight down there).
The secret is in keeping the vaginal muscles toned up - using Kegel exercises, the secrets of which can be found all over the internet. Besides, the vagina is very elastic - it's actually designed to give birth and recover.
Sexual pleasure for a man is not so much about vaginal size or penis size - it's more a matter of vaginal fitness and muscle tone.
And for the record, orgasm ability in women - that is to say, the speed with which a woman reaches orgasm - has very little to do with any physical attribute of her body.
Orgasm speed is much more about how she sees herself, about mental and emotional factors, in other words: and there's no clearer proof of this than the fact that it is possible to make a woman orgasm in only a few minutes - sometime seven a few seconds.
Fact 1 "Whatever size your penis, you can have good sex."
It's not what you got., it's what you do with it......How true. How true. For women, sex is not really about penetration, thrusting and ejaculation, though that may all be exciting and arousing. And the truth is even more complex - for what you believe about yourself determines what you experience in reality. So if you want to manifest more confidence in your cock size, the answer is not to use a penis enlargement program, but to manifest more confidence in yourself by changing the faulty beliefs you hold about yourself.... if you don't really understand this, let me out it another way - if you can't get what you want, try a course on manifestation and attraction.
It's about connection, love, intimacy, closeness, the shared experience, giving pleasure to her man, feeling loved, and so on. Now, do any of those qualities reside in your penis? No, I thought not.
You need to be a romantic man outside the bedroom to feel her love and willingness to make love inside the bedroom. The more you woo her - even when you're married - the more fun in the bedroom you'll have, and the more exercise your penis will get!
Cunnilingus, making love to a vagina using your mouth and tongue, is a superbly delicate skill, which needs patience, practice, and dedication but will make you oh-so-appreciated by any woman who wants to enjoy orgasms - learn to give great oral sex and you're going to be a winner!
Nothing, but nothing, delights a woman more than good cunnilingus.....moist, warm, wet, soft, gentle, rhythmic stimulation of her clitoris, vulva, labia and vaginal entry with your tongue as the main event is going to send her into orbit - and at that point she just isn't going to be looking at the size of your cock!
But even so, why not learn to be a great lover using the organ nature gave you for the purpose - your penis?
Whatever its size, you can learn a whole set of techniques which will have her juices flowing freely in no time at all.
They are Tantric Sex techniques and they are wonderful; you can read about them in these books: Extended Sexual Orgasm by Alan and Donna Brauer and A Beginner's Guide to Tantric Sexuality by Richard Craze.
Fact 2 "Actually, penis size does matter."
Oh no! How can this be? I thought this was a website devoted to proving that penis size was not important....you traitor!
Ah now, wait, that's not what I meant! What I am trying to say is that of course your penis size matters - it certainly matters to you, for good or ill, and it probably matters in some way (which you may not even know about) to your partner.
But none of that denies the truth of what I said above - penis size is ultimately the least important factor in a sexual relationship, unless one or other of you happens to be a real size queen.
(And if you are, or if your penis happens to be three inches wide and eleven inches long, then you have a different set of problems which go way beyond those of a man who thinks his penis is too small when in fact it's perfectly adequate. You might want to have a look at the Large Penis Support Group, which you can find by typing "large penis support group" into Google.
For those men whose penises are between four and seven inches long there will generally be no problem in making love. Anything outside this range may have a few practical problems, but they can always be overcome - remember the values of cunnilingus and fellatio!
Fact 3 "The average penis is smaller than you might expect"
Stop comparing yourself with other men. Remember that the average penis is less than six inches long. Remember that they may all look very different when flaccid, but they all look much more alike when they are erect (true, so very true).
Even if you have a long and thin one normally (or even a long and thick one) and the guy next to you in the locker room has a short fat one, or even just a glans showing, the likelihood is that if you all got together in a room somewhere and showed each other your erections, you'd be astonished at how much more alike than different they were.
And that, of course, is what your woman will see.....she's not got the same view of it as you have, pulling it out of your pants so many times a day to pee.
The reality of the penis is this: there is no such thing as normal, since the variety of shapes and sizes is so great and so widespread.
Small penises expand on erection to look like big penises; big penises just get hard and look like any other erect penis. And I hate to say it, but the more fat you have around your midriff, the smaller your penis will appear. Conversely, to a sexual partner, the more fat a woman has, the less penetration a man can make. Two great reasons for keeping in shape with a good diet, like the Venus factor for women, which you can read about here - the difference between the Venus factor and other popular diets being not just that Venus will make your sex life better, but that it will allow more energetic sex because you feel fitter!
Fact 4 "Use it or lose it."
Suppose you don't masturbate, or you're in a long term relationship where sex has gone off the menu slightly (or totally). Or suppose you're over fifty and you find your sex drive is slowing down somewhat.
Guess what? Your penis is actually going to shrink. Yes, the tissues of the penis will shrink if you don't stretch them with a normal erection every day. The answer to this is to encourage your body to keep itself sexually fit by having an orgasm every day.
This may also help the muscles of your pelvis to stay in trim and your prostate gland to stay healthier; it may also ensure your sex drive stays stronger, longer. In particular, ejaculating regularly seems to keep prostatitis at bay.
Yes, it's true. Studies of men over 50 indicate that the penis shrinks if they don't experience orgasm regularly. If keeping your penis fit and supple is the result of middle-aged sex, what a great reason to enjoy yourself!
Of course one of the problems for men over fifty is that their sex drive may be lower than it used to be.....in which case read the most powerful book about sex after 50 - "All Night Long - How To Make Love To A Man Over Fifty.
As if all these benefits weren't enough, regular sex seems to protect you from a heart attack. A group of researchers questioned almost 1000 men aged between 49 and 59 in Wales about their sexual habits and their state of health. Ten years later, they went back and checked how everyone was doing.
Guess what they found? The men who had sex more often had lived longer than those who didn't have sex so often! And even more interestingly, this was true for all causes of death, not just heart attacks!
While the reason for this is not clear, the answer probably lies somewhere in the beneficial effects of sex: it lowers blood pressure, reinforces the relationship, keeps you active, and so on.
The researchers found that even after they'd allowed for differences in age, social class, alcohol consumption, smoking, blood pressure, and heart disease at the initial interview, it was still the men who had most sex who lived longest!
Updated August 11, 2016
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